For ten damn years we thought they were exclusive. Now it turns out it was all a joke, as the country singer confirms the rumors - she was seeing Roger behind Andy’s back all along. No word yet from the Clemens’ camp on whether she’s lying outright or just ‘misremembering’.
For those of you that simply can’t get through the Daily News’ long and salacious article detailing country singer Mindy McCready’s alleged affair with O.M.G.G. It’s Roger, we’ve created this handy abbreviated version of events:
1. The Rocket launched the affair when she was fifteen.
2. The two once partied with Monica Lewinsky and Michael Jordan in New York.
Well there it is at last - 100% irrefutable evidence that Clemens took ‘roids.
Thursday on YES it was all about the rain. Hughes would have pitched a one hitter - if it hadn’t been for the rain. Olhendorf wouldn’t have kept cruising - if it hadn’t been for the rain. And Joba wouldn’t have ever gotten those pitches up - if it hadn’t been for the rain. To the players’ credit, they refused to buy into Kim Jones’ attempts to get them to agree in post-game interviews. But why should they do the dirty work when YES is so willing to do it for them? Left unsaid, as usual, is the fact that the other team always plays in the very same conditions.
Every week we’ll go inside the head of the Yankees co-chairman. In today’s premier episode, we invite Hank to answer reader email questions:
Hey Hank! To what do you attribute Moose’s success yesterday? Pitching a little more inside? Changing speeds?
Chuck from The Bronx
Hank: F*** no. I’m the one responsible for it. If I hadn’t called out that son of a b**** he would have given up five runs and lasted a third of an inning.
Hank, Oh my God, I love you! Do you worry your words might effect the confidence of our young pitchers (Kennedy, Hughes)? I mean, pleading for Joba in the starting rotation could really hurt their confidence.
Jenny, Manhattan
Hank: Jenny, what the f*** are you talking about? What are they? Girly men? We’re the Yankees for crying out loud! That a****** from the Twins wouldn’t be whining like this. He’s a real pitcher, that guy.
Hey Hank, Given Girardi’s past issues with management in Florida don’t you think you are setting up a potential showdown with him down the road?
Frankie, Long Island
Hank: You sir are a true a******. This is Yankee Universe. What do they have in Florida? A lake or something? Marlin Lake? A Universe is much, much bigger than a f*****’ lake for Christ’s sake. Jesus, Kay! Who’s finding these questions? Lorenz? Fire the guy!
Michael Kay: Well it looks like that’s all the time we have this week. Be sure to join us next time when Hank offers his tips on how to motivate and inspire your employees. See ya’ everybody.
Michael Kay has become to YES what Scott Proctor is to Joe Torre. He’s spread so thin these days we’re beginning to worry about his health. Would it be too much to ask for YES to throw an occasional bone to Bob Lorenz or Kim Jones? Or even that chubby guy we’ve recently seen on the YES website? That being said, the show itself is mostly filler - highlights and previews of upcoming opponents. So what you end up with is maybe only fifteen minutes with Joe and Kay.
Credit Kay with tackling any and every issue in Y.U. — Joba’s dad, Girardi’s dad, youthful pitching woes, Farnsworth’s suspension. Just about everything. YES even tops it off with a series of viewer email zingers that range from ludicrous ( “Will you ever consider becoming a player / manager?” ) to hard-hitting ( “Why do you continue to defend Farnsworth?” ). And although he constantly seems on the verge of some kind of an emotional outburst (doesn’t he always?), Girardi never shies away from any of it. His quiet tension and elevated discomfort level make for what might be YES’ finest half hour.
But why would YES knowingly subject a guy that shies away from the media to this kind of scrutiny? It’s trial by fire, in a secluded YES tested and approved environment. What better way to prepare Girardi for the rigors of the New York media? Also, what better way to disarm the NY media in the process? Their questions won’t be so tough on Joe if he’s already heard and answered them before. And therein lies the true genius of this program.
So how do you improve upon what appears to be a solid show? That’s easy. Cancel it. We want the ‘Hank Steinbrenner Show’. Right now. You’d have to be an idiot not to do it. Just turn on the camera and let him rant for half an hour. That’s Emmy award-winning stuff. We’re sure of it.
It’s the phrase that no one in the Universe will ever utter. And this team can win so many games on the strength of its aging veterans alone, they don’t actually have to. So we’ll do it for them. It’s a rebuilding year. There. That wasn’t so hard. Or if you can’t stomach that, then how about going with something a little more palatable? Maybe ‘transition year’. You don’t want to believe it? Fine. But the facts are staring right at you. This team has become a hazardous mix of erratic youth and veterans. The kids haven’t become supermen by virtue of wearing the pinstripes, like everyone in Y.U. thought. The veterans will still have their Yankeeography Moments. But guys like Damon, Matsui, Giambi, and maybe even Jeter are on the downside and becoming less of a sure thing. Combine the two and you have the ingredients for not just a rebuilding year but possibly a rebuilding era.
Shilling for Joba in the rotation right now? Panic. Fretting over the kids after preaching patience all off-season long? Panic. Calling out Mike Mussina for being the same pitcher he was last year? Panic. Undermining your general manager and team manager twenty games into the season. Panic. Let’s add ‘rookie mistake’ to that list as well. There’s a lot of talk about the Yankee youth movement…. Well Hank is acting exactly like the rookie that he is.
The good news? Michael Kay’s 1050 traffic girl Christina Stoffo is here to help take the edge off.
It’s a well-known secret that there are all sorts of tricks to make people look thinner on television these days. But placing an image of an obese Giants fan (#332) on a monitor isn’t going to keep us from noticing that Michael Kay and YES’ Joe Auriemma are both very overweight. Watch the clip.
No, it’s not Alyssa Milano’s new MLB clothing line. This is the actual, infamous ‘cursed’ shirt for sale. We thought the Yanks would have destroyed this thing.
After all, you just never know…. Maybe the shirt is like a mummy - once you unearth it, the curse begins! Bid on it now.
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